Year 50 In The Life Of Your Cheetah Diva - 2015

Hello, my Lovelies!

Here we are the end of a very interesting and empowering year for your Cheetah Diva.  The way it started out was different from previous years in that I wasn't as stressed about the issues that I've had to deal with. I would love to say that it was stress/drama free, but that wouldn't exactly be the truth. Still, it started out on a high note and ended the same way.

In December of the previous year, I got into an altercation with someone due to instigated drama. That horrific meltdown led me to a miraculous breakthrough in my development as a human being. From that point forward, I made it my mission statement to become a better person and to handle my anger and resulting depression in a different way. I tend to throw myself under the bus and then withdraw, which in turn would have caused the depression to spiral. The start of 2015 was the beginning of the fulfillment of that promise to myself.

Have the problems within my work group gotten better? Uh, no (laughing). Not by a long shot. In fact, an issue earlier this month happened that, in my previous incarnation, would have caused me to either go to jail for dragging, or get fired for cussing. It was done to get a reaction, and instead of giving in to the anger at being interrupted because I was reading about Shannon's (see previous blog entry) service, I calmly wrote an email and allowed my supervisor to deal with it.

The result of this was there was no anger, spiraling, or drama. You know, that felt damn good!  Most of the year was the same way; me not getting angry and allowing the issues to get out of control. Instead, I rationalized the problems that arose and calmly dealt with them.

Now, if I had to be honest with myself, I did have one or two incidents that crashed and burned without me checking them. One of them involved a trusted adviser who was giving me sage advice, but it had been presented to him in a misunderstanding manner that I allowed to fester instead of saying something to him. It wasn't his fault, mind you. I failed to let him know that this issue was dumb, and I internalized it, causing the spiral when I was later confronted about a different issue by my supervisor. When I realized that I was having a crash and burn session, I walked away, caught my breath, and fought my way back up. It took a day for me to push past it completely, but I got there. 

I wish things could be better for me in that place; that people could be adults and work through their issues instead of trying to be superior and "put me in my place," but I'm sorry to say that this ship has passed. When so much has happened and those in authority you rely on to enforce their own rules and guidelines fail you completely, allowing harassment and bullying to go on for years in an unchecked manner, there's no coming back from it or healing it. The only thing that I can do is work on my own development and push forward. If the dogs want to roll around in their own droppings, that's fine; I'm not going to let them pull me into it. I have bigger and better things on the horizon to worry about. I have a beach house in the Caribbean that I need to get. That pretty much means I need to write and sell more books. 

(unsubtle hint - buy my books)

In July, I did my yearly vacation back to the city of my birth and, in a discussion with my mom, stepdad, brother, sis-in-law, and cousin, I finally uncovered the root of what caused my anger management issues, which would cause the depression several years later. It was an awakening moment for me and I think this is when I truly began to heal mentally. Sure, I mind screwed my mother, but collateral damage tends to happen in these situations. I love you, Mommie!!

As a result of how I handled things differently, good things came my way! I jumped head first into my Speculative Fiction writing career and was invited to and spoke at DragonCon in Atlanta for the State of Black Science Fiction. I participated in their Alternate History Black History Month challenge and enjoyed it. I attended several writing classes and seminars, and my latest book, "When You Die, You Go To Mississippi," was nominated for a Cybils Award for Best Speculative Fiction in the elementary and middle school age category. On top of that, I got to to back to Alabama for the Magic City Classic!  Stellar!

In the midst of the angry storm that surrounds me in my every day work life, I managed to have the best year ever. As I reflect back on it, I feel a renewed sense of purpose and joy. The obstacles and bumps along the way didn't seem to slow me down or make a significant difference in the life of your Cheetah Diva. 

This pretty much means that 2016 is going to be bigger and better. I just have to make that happen. A lot will happen - a trip to New York, SOBSFicCon in June, DragonCon, perhaps several others. I'm thinking them over. The writing has continued, although the focus is slightly different. I'm still writing my demon/human romance stories and will kick it off with my "Immortal Anthologies" series, but I'm also edging towards children's/YA fantasy and dystopia. I wasn't expecting to come around to this, but as I look at young people and see them reading, I'm inspired by it. I can't wait to explore this aspect of Speculative Fiction.

There are so many people to thank in my development; my family of course - mom Shirley, stepdad Eddie, brother Marc, sis-in-law Deunjira, my aunt Roz for allowing me to find closure with Phutah and his tragic story, cousins George, Shawn, Tonya, Tish and Juria, and of course my beautiful daughter, Charlene. I don't think I could have been the person that I am today without her.

My dad, Charles. Miss you everyday, but I think I'm going to be okay.

My ABC's from back in the day - Neicy Jones, Tyanna, Ron, Lena, Rhonada, Fonda, Keisha, Kim, Chante, and Neicy Vardiman.

Then there are my WCH family members - Wendy, Linda, Marsha, Michelle (Schultzy), Sherri, Joycelyn, MizTeddy, Denalerie, Nikki, Tami, Carol, Chris10, Jeannine, Pchez, Ms. Melody, Shonda, Maimunah, Carmen, Madie, Charmine, Deborah, Johnetta, LaTrese, Kwanza, Gwendolyn, Arburn, Clara, Shannon Blackmon (rest in paradise), Willona, Myra, Lakme, NaTasha, Brandi, Jennifer, Keisha, Stacie, Charm Carm, Mirrors, Nite Ryder, Nana, Litebright, Sabrina Leon Davis (Rest in Paradise), Bob, Tee Tee, Laird, Star West, Woody, Vynchezo, Adrian, Oienriette, Rona, Tony, Michael, Gvm Dbrd, Anthony, Ty, Tony, Meyca, Geoff, and Olde Timer.

Interesting people along the way - Nancy Krempa, Jenna Shaeffer, Eden Bea, Deirdre H. and Patrick Kennerson, Magic City Classic Road Crew (Will, Austin, Denesha, Teresa, Adrian, Dennis, Stephanie) The Scotts, Sharon Davis, Tony Irby, Gail Goodson, Christopher Maurice Enis, Randy Carabelli (Rest in Paradise), Joan Lathem, Kae Dozier, Garry Pearsall, Dee Lederer, Richard Greenfield, Lynda McDanel, The Hamptons, and Mark McGregory.

Dorthea, of course.

My writing colleagues - Carlette Norwood, Cheris Hodges, Balogun Ojetade, Milton Davis, Eden Royce, Gerald Coleman, Giuseppe Pennestri, Jeff Carroll, Jeff Carroll, Abi Kirk, Kai Leakes, Pepper Pace, and everyone at The State of Black Science Fiction.

If you don't see your name, don't get mad - drop me an email and I'll amend it. I'm preoccupied with reading a book, so I can't focus very well.

Programming note:  I'll be participating at these two Atlanta events this year for sure. The rest of my very hectic schedule will be announced throughout the upcoming year.

Saturday, January 16th 
"You Are The Hero!"
Waterfront Eatery and Wellness Center,

2240 Forest Pkwy, Morrow, Georgia 30260

State of Black Science Fiction Con

Also, this book is stellar!  "Dark Universe" is the collaborative effort of the Kings and Queens of Speculative Fiction. The nerdgasm is killing me! I only pulled away enough to do my year end blog but this story has me hook, line and sinker! It's available at Amazon

My book, "When You Die, You Go To Mississippi" was released September 4th, 2015. Make sure you get it at Amazon

For real...I want my Carribbean beach house, dangit!

The first 50 years of my life have been interesting; good in some places, bad in others, horrific in a few, but I weathered the storm and overall I think I did okay. 2015 has been a year of highs for me and I look forward to 2016 with the same enthusiasm and optimism. The only person that can make that happen for me is me. You're never too old to learn to be a better person. When you can't, that pretty much means that you're dead.

Here's to the next 50, uh...well, here's to life in general. 

Take care, my Lovelies! I'll see you next year!

~me~